new pet

But he gets so lonely so he decides he wants to get a pet for company, but not just any pet he wants something exotic so he goes to the local pet shop.

"Actually we're doing a big trade on these Indonesian centipedes" says the pet shop owner. "They even come in a little house shaped box".

"Done" says the man.

"When he gets home he puts the box on the sideboard. After a couple of hours he gets bored so he goes over to the box and says "I'm going down the pub for a pint, you're welcome to come and meet the lads".

No Reply. So the guy goes off and gets himself some tea. About 30 minutes later he returns and says to the box, "I said, I'm going down the pub, do you want to come?"

Again no reply, so the guy goes and showers. 30 minutes later he goes back to the box and shouts, "Right, you've had your chance, I'm going out".

He's about to walk away from the box when a little voice shouts back.

"I heard you the first time, I'm putting my f**king shoes on!"